I had to take a few days to reflect on my past, present and future. I had to ask myself,”At what point am I going to stop living life like a victim?” My past haunts me. I am still angry. I never got the heartfelt apology that I thought I deserved from the person that I just wanted to love me. A motherless child I am. All people have the capabilities of being Toxic. Mother’s aren’t excluded. I hate when people say,”But it’s your mother, you have to love her.” I just want to scream! I was brutalized for years. A child broken down to the point of where I felt I didn’t exist. I was empty. I didn’t understand what I did to deserve this. Some bonds are meant to be broken. Sometimes you have to “STOP”. You have to cut off that person that brings you grief and heartache. Stopping isn’t just something you do when you are driving or walking. It’s something that you have to do mentally as well. Stop letting them control your greatness. You push forward and be the best you possible. That’s the greatest revenge in the world. Just when they thought they broke you, you stand up and say, “Not today, not now , not ever.”

Published by Mariana Allsop

I am the rose that grew from concrete. Amongst the weeds, I survived against all odds.

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